16 May 2010

Trembling Jell-O

**I usually don’t preface my poetry, however this piece has some disturbing content. This is not autobiographical...who knows from where these things arise... (Is that an adequate warning? )

Trembling Jell-O

Trembling Jell-O
and a pool of piss
is all that will ever
be left of this.
“Give us some whiskey.
Give us a kiss.”

Two detectives came storming
came storming without any warning
and took Uncle Peter away.

In a room without any windows
and an ominous mural sized mirror
they questioned poor Lucinda, dear,
beyond the break of day.
She could not remember anything
(not that she wanted to say)
except the smell of his breath
when he pinned her to
her grandmother’s floral duvet.

He growled his words when he said them
then licked at Lucinda’s young lips.
She turned her head and she kicked him
as cops came crashing in.

The lady cop jostled Jell-O in
to the room with only one door.
She said she thought Lucinda looked thin
and she could always go get more.

Uncle Peter brought her Jell-O
a ridiculous thank you treat.
With gusto, he force fed her,
if she ever refused to eat.

Lucinda lay the Jell-O down and hiked her denim skirt high
she squatted over the Jell-O dish, and let her urine fly.

Thank you to One Single Impression for the prompt.


SandyCarlson said...

An interesting story!

The Dark Lord said...

how charming

Tumblewords: said...

I, too, have no idea where these come from but it was surely an interesting read, intriguing and strong.

brenda said...

Thank you for your comments...I was almost afraid to log back on, because this feels a bit shameful.
Tumblewords, thanks for the connection!

S.L. Corsua said...

It has given a full tank of fuel for my imagination. ;) To me, the piece comes off as a dream sequence. Alternatively, I also 'see' it on stage, as a one-act play.

The fifth stanza, now that made me shiver a bit, with the held-back intensity of the threat behind the lines "she thought Lucinda looked thin / and she could always go get more."

Leo said...

how very interesting! :)

Sandra (if) said...

that is original!

Patti said...

interesting interpretation of the prompt~

Kathiesbirds said...

Well, it is shocking but probably shockingly true. If it did not happen to you, it probably happened to someone somewhere! It is well written.

brenda said...

Thank you all for your comments, I do appreciate them.

SL--I can see the dream sequence, and like that thought. I also appreciate the disgust at the cop's mention of thinness. I had the lady cop do it, as I always got it from my older female relatives. "You need to eat more..."

Toi said...

love this story - film noir-ish.

Roland D. Yeomans said...

I've heard of flash fiction, but this reads like flash poetry. Excellent, brave post, Roland

Amity said...

hmmm...nice...i am in awe!

you write so well Brenda! keep on...:)

gabrielle said...

Lucinda, a proper response if there ever was one.
Disturbing and beautiful piece.

brenda said...

@Toi-I'm imagining it in black and white.
@Roland-Thank you for your comment. I do dapple in some flash fiction--genres definitely meld
@Amity-So glad I read comments this morning. You made my day!
@gabrielle--I'm right there with you! When I finished writing the piece, a voice in my head said, "Go Lucinda!"

Anonymous said...

Um, wow. Great little rhyming bits and pieces in there - could almost hear music behind it. Had the feel of a performance art piece - unusual storytelling with a tad of disturbing mixed in the lot.

- Dina