swallow dives
hard
backwards in wind
=
airplane flies
through
turbulent wind
=
tornado
flies
lives become wind
=
whoosh! cries the
wind
whistling its sin
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A shout out to Tilly Bud, who got me writing piku this week. Tilly authored the prompt at We Write Poems this week. Here it is:
Write a piku. (a cross between a haiku and the first three numbers of pi.)
three lines
3 syllables Line 1
1 syllable Line 2
4 syllables Line 3
Next
choose one or two key words
find rhymes for them
slightly re-write the first piku
12 comments:
Well done, Brenda. I had such fun with the form, and I sense you did too. The third is, sadly, so true this year.
Intriguing. Might have a go at this.
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Well done! I prefer your style of piku, with shifts in meaning more than rhyme. Still, I agree it was a very fun exercise.
I like the variety of meanings you have given to your piku - I am too one-track-minded!
I like your piku.
In one aspect, your piku remind me of ghazals...especially the first three in which you retained the ending rhyming word, "wind". Then there is a shift...the wind stops being the thing acted out/through/against by the subjects in the first three piku and then is clearly pointed out as the offender in the fourth piku.
-Nicole
Intriguing connection between these pikus. Well written!
Brenda, I like your take on the linked pikus, returning to that same end word, except for the last stanza, where it stands forth in the middle. (My punning self now wants to write piku using wind and wound).
Brenda, I like how these turned out.
Pamela
nicely done Brenda.....I couldnt get into this form.....you certainly did well
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Interesting, I like the equals sign dotted all the way through, what was the intended effect of this?
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